I dream of me, explaining to her and how much I loved her and how I hate myself for doing that in the past. though I know its impossible for us to be together again, I woke up hoping that it has happened, not of being together part, but the forgiveness and her smile once again.

Its a total difference story now, the current one, as I mentioned in the blog, I won't see it as a no choice, but a 1 and 2 that I have to make to commit myself into. So I decided to let go, and I know she is sad, me too, but I hope she understand that, I had enough pressure to commit into 1 thing and if I going to have relationship, it could have been a super low commitment or just like they say, flings.

Talking back to my ex, Its totally difference cause I totally just ended it without anything, reason or such. Hai.. I hope she read this, cause the last time I sms her, for a dinner. She din reply me. I hope that we got to see each other soon, in the near future, maybe a dinner or so, is a good start to clear things up. 

Okie, enough of personal entry. Take Care Peeps.

I talked to a friend before, between career and love, what will I pick? Coming on with the current situation I am in, I choose Career. Ya, its kinda of sad, but its the truth fact of what I will pick right. And further more is that, this career is not easy, its not just everyday go work, go home and end story. There are many plans to look out for, schedules to meet, etc. And many times, Sunday can be burnt. 

My energy for a day is burnt out easily if work starts to pile up but Yes, its cool and sweet to receive msgs from your loved one saying how are you, etc. And its nice I mean. 

What I mean here is the commitment, can I really commit to one? I worried I can't. I can't be destroying someone's life because of my obsession with my career. And I also don't want to be that way, I feel bad, sorry and wanted to speak up. But can't, I afraid.

I wanted to be committed to one when I am more stable, in terms of career line, in terms of financial standing. Cause I am now in a rocky situation, anything can affect me. (Rocky as in building up the steps) 

Why the sudden thoughts? I saw my friends, started this line ending his/her relationship because of commitment issue, I agree with that, because its just too hard to fit into 2 squares when your level is only that high. I got friends that has GF or Wife, and they striving to make the balance. I will say they are fairly successful, but its pressurizing to see them in such a stress mode at times.

So my end question, what should I do? I also don't know. Anyone that wish to talk to me about this, feel free to sms me, or msn me. But don't call me please. Even You. Phone talk is so ironic.

Alright.. Take care people..

This car infront of me, suddenly e-brake which cause me to e-brake but because of me not wanting to hit his car, I turned my wheel and thus the bike skid off. My current situation is, I got some injured toes, but nothing that serious, and my bike having scratches on my side box (deep) and my crash bar, and also to my very cool front headlight, the side chrome got chip off. (The repair work will be getting the chrome paint and black paint from D.I.Y shop to fit up the patches)

If you saw a yellow light and you are 10 m away from the line, will you speed up to cross it or e-brake? Most of us, including me, will pick up and pass the line, cause we know that if we e-brake, either we will cross the line and cross traffic problem or we will cross vehicle from behind to hit us. But this cute guy,(adult man) actually E-BRAKE!! and because his brake is stronger than mine, my e-brake doesn't stop in time and enough to be in safe from contact to him. Causing the above to happen. 

It is because of this people that cause the chain car crashes because they suddenly e-brake for no apparrent reason. And bare in mind I not that close to him, I am 1 car distance away from him and we travelling at around the same speed, i can't imagine if I had went closer to him because of wanting to over take and he suddenly e-brake because of the traffic light! I think I wont be here typing blog le. Zzzz.

This prop is called Crystal Striptease and the last 2 nights,  I technically went down to the workshop to do the finishing. Sad to say, it will not be sold locally, so ya, too bad for local magicians. LOL!!

Well, I personally like technical stuffs as it brings a sense of achievement everytime you finish a product, esp doing video, building props, etc. :) I someone that look into details but can waste alot of time just because of that.

I glad that this prop is done and we are on the way to doing the magic with it. 

Talk about work, I finally finished off quite a few videos and they are uploaded and running. So if you are interested or curious or dying to know what they are, you can simply go to Youtube, search for 'Magic babe' Ning, or J C Sum and the uploaded by should be conceptmagic. In any case that you ran across those videos, ENJOY it, or else you get it!! LOL!! Joking.

Other thing will be illusions building, I starting to handle another kind of work that is relative to magic, or i should say, quite important. I like the ideas and concept behind each construction, esp with my mechanical knowledge and interest, I am quite "into" this work and learn something out of it. :)

As for my show!! Well, thats the cool part then, I going to rework all my acts esp after the heavy work load in the last few months, and practise hard on them. Please push me if you see me slacking in front of the computer. :P (Don't do it so obviously)

Well, there is a price to pay for anything that we want to do, no matter in terms of time, money or freedom. But if you enjoy doing it, it will be worth while.